CONSUL ROBERT C. FENWICK '82
LIVING OUR VALUES
"... AND A DEEP SENSE OF PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY
by Robert Fenwick, ’82
by Robert Fenwick, ’82
Leadership is not always the result of an election or a promotion in rank or title. Our world is full of examples of people that have assumed positions of power or influence that are very poor leaders. We see them puffed up with ego or credentials of qualification, but they are often disappointing in their lack of results as they quickly seek to blame others and avoid personal responsibility. As a Sigma Chi Consul, leading an active chapter of over 100 young men provided me plenty of opportunity to inspire and motivate, but all of us share in the individual choice to lead by our own example of action and behavior.
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One Monday night over 40 years ago, I concluded a chapter meeting by asking my Brothers if they were proud to wear the badge of Sigma Chi…and if they understood “that the bond of our fellowship is reciprocal” in that we were granted favor and distinction by Sigma Chi and that this privilege of brotherhood depended on us to build and conduct ourselves to ever be a credit to our Fraternity. Of course I got the expected reply from my Brothers that evening. Yes, we were proud to be Sigs. Yes, we were leading the Greek system of fraternities and sororities on campus. Yes, as evidence of our leadership in sports, academics, and social prestige we had a pledge class of 33 young men that all wanted to join us in brotherhood. What more could a Consul want?
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As the chorus of positive affirmation died down, I then asked how it was possible that over 100 brothers could come through the front door bearing the big bold Greek letters for Sigma Chi, enter our chapter on a daily basis all week proudly wearing our badges of distinction… while the now week old evidence of raw egg mess was on our front door. Someone had thrown eggs at our front door, and not one of us had taken responsibility to clean it up all week. Not a Brother, not a Pledge, not me, not them, nobody, while every one of us abdicated the responsibility as someone else’s job to clean up the mess. Of course, there was a stampede minutes later and I still remember the faces of my Brothers scraping the golden yellow egg evidence from our front door. But no, in my mind, we (and I) had tarnished Sigma Chi by our inaction.
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In life, we must all be leaders of our own self. Our choices and actions, right or wrong, mistakes and what we can learn from them, all contribute to how we learn, grow, and mature. I am not the first to tell you that life is not and will not be easy, but you can be certain that nobody else will live your life for you. How you succeed or fail is up to you and, after decades of experience, I still believe that the keys for success in life are found in The Norman Shield, the pledge book reference manual of Sigma Chi. Whether you were attracted by our founding principles and ideals or by legacy, the Spirit of Sigma Chi assures us that each of our unique temperaments, talents, and convictions is superior to sameness… and that collectively we can maintain the friendship of our brotherhood without giving up our individuality or sacrificing our personal judgement.
Quick now, what are the last two words of The Jordan Standard? “Personal Responsibility” are not just words of hope or aspiration, they are part of the selection criteria for our fraternity membership. In short, we seek quality over quantity, regardless of your background because we value the differences of opinion and experience that collectively make us stronger for common purpose in friendship. None of this says you must compromise your principles for the common good. Nor do you have the unrestricted right to compromise the fraternity of all of us by your bad behavior, your justifications, or by blaming others.
For me, the blame game is a sign of immaturity and it is the exact opposite of personal responsibility. I have witnessed the blame game in life and in the closure of our chapter with finger pointing all around - young, old, active, alumni, International HQ, University, fraternity/sorority image in media, even societal lack of quality role models -
Where does it end? Let’s start with you and me and personal responsibility. We must agree that we are willing to live by the standards of our fraternity ideals and I believe that these are higher than for society’s standard for individual behavior in general.
For me, the blame game is a sign of immaturity and it is the exact opposite of personal responsibility. I have witnessed the blame game in life and in the closure of our chapter with finger pointing all around - young, old, active, alumni, International HQ, University, fraternity/sorority image in media, even societal lack of quality role models -
Where does it end? Let’s start with you and me and personal responsibility. We must agree that we are willing to live by the standards of our fraternity ideals and I believe that these are higher than for society’s standard for individual behavior in general.
Moreover, our chapter history is rich in inspiration examples. E.B. and Irene, Rosa Alston, and others were important role models for me, but for those three in particular, if you did not behave as a gentleman first and foremost, they would not waste their time on you. In a chapter of our size, there were plenty of mistakes so I was often on the front line of apologizing for them, but in their own ways each of these icons of our chapter legacy were impatient with excuses and quick with asking “now, what is our plan to fix it?”. With E.B. especially, it was always expected that there would be reporting on the plan progress, and agreement that the problem was “fixed” was when he was satisfied, because he had also accepted responsibility on behalf of all of us.
As our Chapter Advisor and Brother, he must have seen the same mistakes happen from one generation to the next, yet his sense of personal responsibility was so strong and secure that the lessons to be learned from mistakes and corrective action were more valuable than the wins. He was not fooled by flattery or glowing reports of our success on campus or in The Magazine, as he taught us the meaning of personal responsibility in his every day action and behavior. Promises were just the same as excuses to him and I believe he judged all of us by our actions and good deeds rather than words. |
So, in honor of those who came before us, and those that will follow, join me in accepting responsibility rather than blaming others, or making promises that are thin on delivery. Make a pledge to yourself to organize your life around a framework of honesty with yourself. Be humble rather than self-promoting. Be a better communicator not by forcing your opinion on others but by setting realistic expectations with others for your actions. Over-promising and under-delivering and putting things off to the last minute are not examples of taking personal responsibility. This just hurts everyone and worse, everyone sees it coming as there is no time budgeted to put forth the very best we have to give.
Sigma Chi owes us nothing and we will have nothing to be proud of for the tomorrows and Homecomings to follow at MSU unless we are willing to learn from our mistakes and have the courage to rebuild to live again stronger and healthier. You and me and today’s Sigma Chi leadership everywhere are in this together, and I am willing to admit, learn, mentor, inspire and do whatever it takes to get our Chapter back. After over 40 years of Sigma Chi friendships, to do nothing and wait for others to clean up the stain on our front door, cheats us all and robs future pledge classes of the decades of Brotherhood and personal growth that the rest of us enjoy. |
Robert C. Fenwick, Class of 1982.
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At Gamma Psi of Sigma Chi we offer a number of leadership opportunities to develop your skills and confidence. These traits are essential in today's fiercily competitive workplace. See below our list of those in-house leadership positions alone.
Consul (President)
Pro Consul (Vice President) Annotator (Secretary) Magister (Pledge Master) Quaestor (Treasurer) |